Friday, November 30, 2007

Dear St. Therese,

~ Little Flower~

Please teach me how to be completely dependent on God so that I recognize my nothingness. I cannot correct my faults but I insist on trying – as tho I had the ability to do that or anything else on my own. I understand that my good deeds are only done with the graces and talents God has given me. Why do I think my faults/sins could be corrected on my own? What ability do I falsely think I have?

I am neither good nor bad as I am nothing. You’ve described your body as an envelope. You’ve described yourself as a grain of sand. Those are things that are completely ignored. An envelope is empty and useless once it has fulfilled its purpose. What envelope or grain of sand is appreciated, remembered or even noticed?

It is only God; His talents thru me and His mercy to me. I should spend my time praising and thanking Him rather than on self focused activities.

I understand your way but I get too
tangled up to be able to live it. Will you help me please? I humbly thank you.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

I thirst

Grace is free flowing like water. It must be. Water will find a way thru any barrier. It can smooth out a stone. Such is grace. No matter how high my self imposed wall is (self will) God’s grace eventually permeates my soul and drenches me with forgiveness. His grace fills in the cracks of the dried up clay I become and allows me to be malleable in God’s hands. When I feel empty and when I thirst God’s grace blesses me with sustenance. This world is not satisfying; rather it actually creates a hunger and a thirst for something of greater substance. It’s a chronic soul ache that can only be sated by God’s grace. Nothing or no one else has the capacity to fill that void. “God alone suffices” St. Teresa of Avila aptly said, because the Artist knows His design.

I beg for your grace, Lord.
What is grace to me? It’s the help you give me Jesus. It’s a warm touch that thaws a cold heart. It’s what rounds off the sharp edges of my personality. It’s the hand on my shoulder that calms me when my insides are shaking. Your grace is the bit of energy I get to carry me thru when I’m exhausted and I still have a To Do list. Your grace is what keeps my tongue still and my mouth shut when I’m feeling the urge to verbally strike out or to talk about another person. It’s the connection you make with me during a busy day that reminds me of who I really am and who You are.
I beg for your grace, Lord.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

I'm hungry...

That I want Thee. Only Thee – let my heart repeat without end. All desires that distract me, day and night, are false and empty to the core. As the night keeps hidden in its gloom the petition for light, even thus in the depths of my unconsciousness rings the cry – “I want Thee. Only Thee.”

As the storm still seeks its end in peace when it strikes against peace with all its might even thus my rebellion strikes against thy love and still its cry is “I want Thee. Only Thee.”
-by Tagore Gitanjali

said another way......
Text: Luke 19:28-40
...Some of the Pharisees in the crowd said to him, “Teacher, order your disciples to stop.” He answered, “I tell you, if these were silent, the stones would shout out.”

and another way.

Everything else is just something on the journey toward Him.

Friday, November 09, 2007

About drinking the cup...

When arrested in the garden and Peter the apostle cut off a soldier’s ear Jesus said, “Put your sword away. Shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?” Jn 18:11

We pray lots of prayers and go to church every Sunday. But when it’s offered to me thru some relationship issue, health problem or life situation ~

Shall I not drink the cup?

It all leads up to that. I’m not 20 yrs old anymore nor new to the Catholic life. If I can’t actually drink the cup then it’s all talk.
Jesus knew what was going to happen but being fully human it must have hurt him terribly to have his friend apostle Judas betray him. Jesus’ response was the return of an embrace to Judas and the question

“Shall I not drink the cup?”

* When my to do list is longer than the hours in a day
* When ‘a friend’ turns on me or gossips about me
* When my health or that of a loved one moves beyond regular aches and pains into something more serious
* When expenses go up but my paycheck doesn’t

Each answer should beShall I not drink the cup?”

Jesus left His Word in the Bible so we’d know what to do and how to act. He did that so we could follow His example. Knowing we can’t even do that without His help and grace~ let’s each go on our way today abandoning our independence and self will armed with his grace to drink the cup we are offered today.

Friday, November 02, 2007

A Special, Secret Place

Close behind and close in front you fence me around,
shielding me with your hand.”
Ps 139

I’m in a protective bubble – the bubble is your grace Lord. Bad things, words, events might try to penetrate and they may actually get to my body…but they won’t reach my soul. It is yours, my Lord. It is your life within me, my Jesus. I won’t deny you and you won’t deny me so we’re kind of stuck together in the protective bubble of my soul. It’s an intimate place where we can enjoy each other’s company. No one in the world knows where it is so they can’t know the way there. That’s between you and me. It’s our place and our time together.
So special. So sacred. So holy. So ours. Amen